Monday, June 18, 2012

Eating my emotions....

So, as I look at this cupcake, hmmm....this cupcake isn't a baby....what am I hoping it's gonna do for me? Dude! I don't even LIKE cake?!?! What is going on?!?! Well, that would be the fact that because I had a bad day...finding out that after my first round of clomid (a fertility drug) and lots of lovin', I did not in fact ovulate this past cycle. Well, I'm SICK of it! I'm sick of being fat! I'm sick of worrying about a baby & I'm sick of not feeling like I belong in my body! I'm tired of swollen feet from crazy hormones & I'm tired of hormones affecting my weight like it has. I'm done blaming things & I'm just ready to kick butt! So, instead of using this blog to share nice things happening to me (there's not much else going on besides work & school & pure exhaustion) I'm going to use it to tell my story of what's going on with me & vent to myself a little bit (for all posterity to read later.....great). It's time for a little therapy for myself! I have stared at my LAST cupcake full of guilt & disapointment, self blaming & iced with a little self loathing for not being able get pregnant this last 2 & 1/2 years & I am going to get skinny! Haha. So...on to my diet....Woot woot!